May 20, 2026 / by Judith Birkey
Lonely people are everywhere. How does the Lord want me to connect with people and meet them in their loneliness and point them to the Friend of sinners?
I live 30 minutes from almost anywhere, we have two busy children, I live with chronic illness & the fatigue it brings, my farmer husband has an erratic schedule, and my 86 & 96 year old in-laws are our primary source of childcare. In other words, I live in survival (& sometimes crisis) mode. How can God use me?! What can I do?!
I can text. I can pray. And I can go to the post office. 🙂
In our village, we pick up our mail at the post office. A year ago, the husband next door went on hospice. There wasn’t much I could do to help his wife. Due to a severe cat allergy, I couldn’t even pop in for a visit. But I can go to the post office!
She entrusted their post office key to me, and for the many months she sat by his side, I picked up their mail, and our 8 year old daughter hung it in a bag on their doorknob. Our 11 year old son offered to mow their yard. And we rolled their garbage can to the street each Thursday.
After he passed away, the widow said, “You have been the best neighbors we could have ever asked for. God used you as His servants to help us in so many ways!!”
We just did the things we do in our life – go to the post office & mow our yard & shovel the snow & take out the garbage – and did it for them, also.
What else can I do? Research ways to meet our children’s needs and advocate for them. So, when a neighbor texted me: “Our neighbor is asking for some sort of extra curricular for a first grade boy who has special needs. Any thoughts or ideas?” I had answers. Based on my past twelve years of research, I easily had 18 recommendations for her. I like to think that those recommendations might reduce the loneliness of the mom.
A few years ago at a church event, I sat by another mom, and we almost immediately realized we have some of the same pain points in our lives. We didn’t run into each other at church for months, but we kept texting encouragement back & forth, and the Lord built a friendship which has reduced some of my own loneliness (& I believe some of hers as well).
Psalm 68.6 says, “God sets the lonely in families.” How does He want to use us in His work of providing community for the isolated? I could text a widow (there are 5 on our street!). Our daughter could color Easter cards for our neighbors. I can train our children to hold a door and look store clerks in the eye as a simple way to treat them with dignity. And I can pray: ”Lord, open my eyes to see the people around me. Open my eyes to their needs. Open my eyes to how You want to use me.”
Judith is married to Jim and they have two children. They have been attending East White Oak for 14 years. Judith enjoys learning old hymns, reading missionary biographies, and sipping a strong cup of tea. In years past, she has served in Sunday school, nursery, and women’s ministry.
Learn more about Neighboring!
Consider how you can serve your neighbors by visiting the East White Oak Outreach page and discover creative ways to serve your neighbors, make disciples, and read some fantastic stories! Download this Community Engagement Guide or grab a printed copy at the Gospel Resource display at church to learn how to engage with and share your faith with a simple 3-Circle Gospel Outline!
We’re praying for your outreach! Do you have a story to share? Contact [email protected].
